SECRET SONG!

 

You have found a secret, hidden page on my website!

 

This one features a song that a friend and I wrote for 7th Level Bards, a concept of an album of songs that might exist in a D&D type universe.  Imagine you are in a old tavern and the evening entertainment is four fun loving musicians.  The lead begins to tell a tale while the other three hold something like a trombone, a euphonium, and a trumpet.  As the story hits its climax, they realize they are playing the wrong instruments and switch them around with each other.

 

There are musical cues for each of the bards, the king, and such, and the whole thing is made as if it is a famous song that the crowd already knows and sings the last line with the performers.

 

This recording was our mock up, using samples instead of real horns.  We never got around to recording the real thing.  But here it is anyway!  As always, Scott wrote the story and lyrics, I did the music.

Three Merry Bards - Scott Waisner - Chris Merritt
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Three Merry Bards

by Chris Merritt and Scott Waisner

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Once upon a time...

 

On the great continent of Alahn there lived three budding performers,

 

Caltos, a tall smiling fellow,

Durane, a bespecticled lad with a heart of gold,

And Starn, a poor chap whose instrument kept changing shape,

 

Far away in the city of Turmach, which is a fine city sitting on the Scarlet Shore whose major exports include, well let's not get into that,

 

The court composer had died,

 

Not from natural causes mind you, he had been found in bed with the king's daughter,

 

So, the king sent out messengers far and wide declaring that he was in need of a new composer,

 

Well this great proclamation led to the largest bardic contest the country had ever seen,

 

BARDS

 

Three merry bards from Turmach,

With nowhere to call home,

The next tavern their castle,

As ever did they roam,

 

LEAD

 

So Caltos, tall and smiling, bid farewell to his blushing bride as he set off on the dusty road towards Turmach,

 

Durane, with new spectacles on his nose, caught a caravan heading north,

 

As Starn, with a weary shrug, decided court composer was better than being a farm hand all his life and saddled up his favorite donkey,

 

BARDS

 

Three merry bards from Turmach,

With nowhere to call home,

The next tavern their castle,

As ever did they roam,

 

LEAD

 

They play instruments, I never said they were fine vocalists,

 

So, the day of the great contest came and went, and when the sun set on the mighty castle, three men stood alone,

 

Caltos, Durane, and by some odd twist of fate, Starn,

 

When suddenly, because everything in these stories happens suddenly,the king was hit by divine inspiration and ordered the bards to switch instruments,

 

BARDS (Singing while switching instruments)

 

Three merry bards from Turmach,

With nowhere to call home,

The next tavern their castle,

As ever did they roam,

 

LEAD

 

You see the king thought that is wasn't Starn's fault his playing was bad but merely the horn he played,

So Starn, with new horn in hand, awed all in attendance,

And was fitted with the title of court composer!

 

(The three bards play a wonerful fugue on their new instruments)

 

LEAD

 

Starn, ever the humble lad, was amazed and asked his new friends, Caltos and Durane to assist him in his new role,

Together, with the addition of some real vocalists,

The Three Merry Bards lived happily ever after!

 

Well except for the time Caltos was found in the princess's boudoir, but that's another story for another day...

 

BARDS

 

Three merry bards from Turmach,

Have found themselves a home,

Now famous composers,

 

(Joined by everyone in the crowd)

Nevermore to roam!